Too Tight Jeans

Raise your hand if you have a pair of jeans or trousers in your closet that do not fit you...Or maybe its a dress that just won't zip. Or maybe it's a suit that feels ready to tear every time you lift your arms. Perhaps you are holding onto a pair of shoes that are just gorgeous but hurt like the dickens every time you wear them giving you blisters and back pain. Any of these sound familiar? I have a pair of jeans that I bought years ago when I was going through a really bad breakup and using anger to over-exercise. They fit me for about a month and then I became happier and they haven't fit since. That doesn't mean I don't try them on occasionally and feel bad about myself for not being "smaller". Why am I holding onto a pair of jeans that do not fit and have not fit for several years?

"But Sarah, I was healthier three years ago, it wasn't anger running, it was right before my wedding and that's the reason I bought my jeans. But now my doctor tells me to lose weight and so I want to fit into my older jeans. I have joined and gym and I am eating right and I am drinking my weight in water and I am going to lose weight and fit into those jeans. Those jeans are my inspiration! They keep me going"

OK, fair enough. But let me ask you this. When you try on jeans (or whatever your non fitting item is) that are too tight and you cannot zip up, does it make you feel motivated and good or does it make you feel bad about yourself? I know for me when I try on clothes that are too tight, I do not grin from ear to ear as I lace up my sneakers and merrily go for a run. I feel worse and I often think that eating or sitting around feeling bad about myself or possibly trying on more clothes that don't fit will help. And unfortunately it never does. I have found through my own experience that holding onto clothes that don't fit us is not inspiration, it is depression.

And the same thing goes for the clothes that don't fit in our minds. I have a whole drawer of "mind clothes" that haven't fit for ages; "truths" I tell myself to make me better. I bet you have some too. A few examples of tight jean truths are: "I am such an idiot. Why do I always do that? Nice guys finish last. In order to be beautiful I need to look like (insert your person here). I am too (fat/skinny/pale/dark). Why would anybody (love/cherish/date) me?"

These statements are just like your Too Tight Jeans. Every time you try them on (or say them to yourself) they make you feel worse, not better. Why do we tell ourselves we are not good enough? I think it's because we think that by saying it, it will help, we will feel better, we will do something about it. But usually we don't. Why don't we stop saying/wearing these clothes and just say/wear something else? Why don't we get rid of our TTJ and wear some clothes that fit.

Even if you think the TTJ's you say are true. Even if you truly believe that you need to be more ______ in order to be more ______. Is it making you feel better to say that? Is it making you more motivated to achieve it? Is it actually helping? Or is it just inspiring you to feel worse?

This week I would like you to take a look at your Too Tight Jeans. The ones in your closet and the ones in your head. Its the perfect time for a little spring cleaning.